Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Sorry i am not sorry.

Firstly let me say that the title is not mine. I borrowed it from a blog that i stumble upon.  It was a weigh loss blog and now i cant find it to credit it.  So if the author ever stumbles onto this post.  My apologies.

The post focused on the things that the blogger was not sorry about.  It really made me think.  What are you not sorry about?  What are the things that you do and will continue to do even if it pisses everyone else off?

Well, here are some of the things that Sorry, i am not sorry for:

Sorry, I am not sorry that i am an anal mother.  I know i hover.  I know i overdo it sometimes.  I like my kids to sleep in their own beds in their house.  I struggle to trust baby sitters.  I tell them i love them a zillion times a day.  I struggle being apart from them.  I stress about the long term impact of things that happen to them.  I try a bit hard.  I am psychotically, claw your eyes protective.  And damn it, sorry but i am not sorry about it.  Those are my kids.

Sorry, i am not sorry that i dont want to hang out with people i dont really like.  When i was younger i had lots of friends.  Or more specifically i had lots of people i knew.  And i hung out with them excessively swinging from one social event to another.  Visits and meals and movies and.  And now i dont want to any more.  I like my own company.  I like silence.  Alot.  I dont want to waste my time on people who frankly i dont care about or like.  I like my kids and my husband and my some of my family.  And if i make an effort to hang out with you please know its because i really like you.  Otherwise i just would not bother.  Really i would not.

Sorry, i am not sorry that i dont care that i can come across super nerdy and old maidy when i do my crafts and read my thousands of books.  Thing is this is not high school anymore, i am never going to wear a mini skirt, and party like its 1989.  No.  Never.  I am never going to look like a supermodel and i feel okay with that.  I want to do things that make me happy. And some of those things may appear old fashioned or boring.  And thats fine.  I dont want to go to a night club.  But i like my chair and a movie.  Throw in my cross stitch and a cappucino and i am happier then a pig in mud.  So if you come to my house and see me in my comfy unsexy pjs - sorry i am not sorry.

Sorry i am not sorry that i want to do things that are right for me.  For me and my family.  I want to live in another country and thats it.  I am an atheist and thats it.  I dont want to explain why i want to do these things.  I just want to and i believe it all goes black when i die so why not?  I am not going to change my views or my plans to may you happy. 

So thats it.  That feels so good i might do it again some time.  But right now, Sorry i do have to get back to work.

So tell me what are you not sorry for?


No comments:

Post a Comment